Rain

February 1st 2011:

It is Tuesday evening. And I am sitting in a coffee shop, watching torrential rain pour down outside the window.

Yes. That's right.

It's Tuesday.

On September 28th, I was writing in my journal and was expressing my feeling that God was asking me to stay. To stay on the road I was on. "Keep going," I heard Him say. Comparing my life to southbound I-75. I told God, "I'm trusting You. Trusting that if I stay where I am right now, You'll let me know when it's time to make a change."

Exactly four months later - to the date - I feel something shift. In the driver's seat I saw God sit up a little straighter, turn down the radio, and lean forward over the steering wheel. This was not where I expected the change to occur. I didn't expect to get off at this exit.

But I asked Him to let me know. To whisper into my heart the truth about my life and my path. To lead me.

So here we go.

I've been searching for peace. Digging for it. Calling for it.

But peace is not mine to take. Peace is mine to receive.

And I cannot... nor do I ... serve two gods. I serve one God. The God of peace.

The prince of darkness has no power over me.

And although he is trying to tear me down... convince me that I am not worthy, that I am not good enough...

God is coming in close. Right in between my shoulderblades. Whispering something beautiful into my ears...

Something about sacrifice.

Something about trust.

Something about my worth.

And stretching.

-

Tonight, it rained.

Which does not mean the blessing from Tuesdays has been removed.

But it means I have been released.

To go.

To grow.