misplaced

There is a pattern emerging and my heart has caught on.

I sense this rising.  Feel that long forgotten feeling of something being stitched together.

Frantically I try and pull apart the seams.  Undo what's been done.

No, I shake my head.  I know better.

I have managed, thus far, to remain somewhat detached.

Self preservation.  Survival mode.  I know what I must do to make it through.

Expectations are clear.  I am never surprised.  Even a glimmer of hope feels misplaced, based on the truths I know.

But it happens, then, that something beyond the norm catches my eye.

Something whispers of more and I pause, hold my breath.

Surely not.

No, no.  I shake it off.

Even as a hope is realized.

Inhale, exhale through the fleeting sweetness.

I do.  I know better.  


Rain pelts against the window and I long to stay.

There is a rhythm here.  An unexpected comfort.

This whisper of more is heavy as the cloud cover.

Pause.  But only for a moment.

One look, one glimpse.

I shut the door behind me and turn my face from the downpour.

If only, lingers on my lips.

Oh, the dangers of hoping.